Dating With The (Almost) New You For the first time in our childhood, a few years ago, the only criteria to measure our self-worth was how we looked. There was no way out for us, however, as we had well-funded, well-groomed and properly crafted egos, so it was hard to hear that it might be possible to be more than what the public see in us. Getting into the business of self-actualization was slow, but the first beginning of this awakening didn’t occur until around the age of 20. I was working in an administrative job at the university, and the woman who sat directly below me in the hierarchy watched me from afar, often scolding me for being smart and inquisitive about everything. She had a great supply of people who worked under her and she was quite the reader. That was the thing about that particular job: They didn’t demand anything of us. We could do as we pleased. When the job did become demanding, she moved over to a higher position on the hierarchy and fell out of my life. The first taste of defeat for my ego was one I didn’t expect, and it taught me a lot about myself. If you don’t want to come across as a self-important jerk, perhaps this is the low point of your career. The second low point didn’t begin to roll until I saw a woman who seemed to have the perfect life: her looks, her job and her parents, even though she was a grade below me at school. Her upper-class parents couldn’t stand me, and they didn’t like me much, either. But her mom was the sort who could snap a good rubber band at 100 yards, and a year or two later they were married. I remember going to the wedding because I wanted to see what her “perfect life” might look like, and she had one of the most horrendous clothes I’d ever seen. I was so distracted by what I was seeing that I forgot to acknowledge her good looks. Something had been struck within me: Maybe there were other women who were beautiful and successful and happy. If they were, they were the reason why things could work out for me. If I was lucky, I would find someone who made me happy. That idea took root a few years later when my best friend decided to start a new career. It took a while, but she found the perfect job, and she began to
* **Use your e-mail wisely:** You may find your true love using a modern dating app (see next chapter). But if you’re in a long-distance relationship, e-mail can also be a great way to keep up with your partner. _A romantic gesture is a small, thoughtful act that speaks volumes about who you are. Maybe your partner doesn’t send a handwritten note, but they do buy you a bouquet of flowers. Or they call you on Valentine’s Day and find a charming way to remind you of your most precious qualities._ # **18 Days to a Happy Relationship** Romantic gestures may not be necessary in all relationships, but they are definitely helpful to keep the passion flowing between two people who care about each other. The following list is compiled of some of the most well-known and well-regarded gestures you can make when starting a new relationship. * _A_ _little_ _something_ _from_ _the_ _heart:_ Give your partner a personal gift as a way to show how much you care. Whether it’s a card, a small gift, or a breakfast in bed, a gesture of love is well worth the little bit of extra effort you put into it. * _An_ _aroma_ _of_ _roses:_ Flowers sent to your partner through the mail are a quick, easy, and unexpected gesture of affection. Sending flowers can also be a good way to ease into the relationship, as you can pretend you are picking a bouquet for yourself and then drop them off later. * _A_ _bout_ _you:_ Write down some words that describe your partner in a way that makes them feel special. Put these notes somewhere in your house where you can see them, and when you feel like being romantic, read them to your partner. * _An_ _adventure:_ Take your partner out on a date that they’ll remember for the rest of their lives. Whether it’s a very serious surprise date for two or a romantic weekend, go on an adventure together and see the world. * _A_ _message:_ Send your partner a note that tells them how you feel about them or is a written explanation of something that happened the previous day or week. * * * # WINE AND DATE Wine is a classic gesture and, therefore, not particularly ”

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